Sunday, May 17, 2015

Why Telling Someone Who's Sick "It's like you're on vacation." Is Never Okay

Ah, the naïveté of the "normal".

First, let me just say that referring to my (or anyone else's for that matter) medical leave as "getting a break" or "being on vacation" is straight up dumb. To the outsider, I'm sure it seems like I'm probably doing nothing all the time, but it is quite the contrary.

I would love to be on vacation. But guess what? Even when I would get a vacation, I don't think I would ever actually be on one, if that makes sense. I would love to temporarily (or permanently, obvs) remove myself from my pain and perpetuating factors to actually relax, enjoy myself and not feel uncomfortable. That would be awesome. When I will fly to London, I will now have a wheelchair, special accommodations and seating, extra drugs, carry ons, etc. Planning this flight alone has been exhausting/pain in the ass.

Like today, for example, my pain and GI issues were so bad that I have been nauseous, dizzy and spasming all day. I heard the weather was nice. I wouldn't know since I didn't get to leave the house. And more often than not, this happens pretty frequently. And, like I've said many times before, I have pretty much no medication to help with my pain.

"Normal" people---when you have the worst kind of flu for 2 weeks, do you truly feel like you got a break or had a vacation? I would imagine between the fatigue, muscle aches, nausea/vomiting, fevers, etc. that you would probably say no. Keep that in mind when you're talking to someone with chronic pain.

To be honest, through all the hard work I put in before having to move home--between working, school, internships, etc. this is single-handedly the most exhausting full time job I've ever had. Even things that used to be enjoyable (ie. going out with friends, actual vacations, dating) are just stressful and generally miserable. Most of the time, physically, I am miserable.

Rant over.

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