Thursday, May 28, 2015

EDS and PMS (heh.)

Things that don't occur when you don't have chronic pain/Ehlers Danlos Syndrome: already atrociously bad PMS pain increases x2390583409853098. 

Who do you see when this happens? A reproductive endocrinologist, duh. (A subcategory of GYN--also its own mindfuck.) Don't feel bad if you don't know this--I didn't either. 

I started noticing over the last 6 months, I was starting to have a serious increase in pain, nausea, dizziness around my 10 day mark, 5 day mark and 3 day mark (I know, specific.) . It would always foil my plans of exercising, doing errands, attempting to live like a somewhat normal human being, etc. 

Ironically, like I'm finding with most things, most of my "hunches" (and maybe what peers and naive observers would consider "hypochondriacal observations") turned out of course to be a real thing, like usual. After aggressively researching and consulting with reproductive endocrinologist, I found that progesterone is a hormone that loosens the joint, understandably, for childbirth--and it's what has been aggressively fucking me over (for lack of a better phrase) for months. 

(Side note: after some research and phone calls, I found out who all the (slight sarcasm) reproductive endocrinologists were in the area and one was the father of a good acquaintance from high school--who no doubt, wants to be in fashion design. In exchange for some advice, I got an apportionment within a week for what usually takes months! It's all about the craftiness, people. And proof that knowing a thing or two about fashion does come in handy in very odd scenarios periodically--no pun intended.)

Anyway, for all the information I overloaded this poor doctor with, he was incredibly sweet, accommodating (and like most new doctors who are totally shocked how self aware I am and the depth of my knowledge on this particular subject), mildly overwhelmed. His first comment after my 15 minute long spiel about me and my mother's conspiracy theory about progesterone, EDS and all over my shitty metabolic reactions to medication/birth control, his first comment was simple and something I totally missed...because when you're so detail oriented you miss the big picture.

Him: "Well do you even want or need a period?"
Me: (Without thinking twice about what was about to come out of my damn mouth) "HA.. NO! I would have a hysterectomy if I knew I didn't want or couldn't have kids in a heartbeat!" 

Ah, the plight of an oversharer. 

He explained to me that I could change my Nuvaring every 3 weeks and use a new one right away to skip all the wild hormone spikes I was desperately trying to adapt to. Hopefully just exchanging it after 3 weeks instead of for will keep everything stable and I'll never need to deal with periods ever again. And, bonus points, I don't have to go off of my birth control!

His back up plan: a Lupron Depot injection which is pretty much an injection that shuts down your ovaries and uterus for about 6 months aka a temporary hysterectomy. Seems terrifying. 

The catch? Instead of PMS pain, you get to become menopausal at the ripe age of 25! Hard pass on that one. Explaining hot flashes on a first date is something I just can't mentally handle right now. And I am trying my best not to screw myself over before I leave for London WHICH AS OF NOW IS SEPTEMBER 6! 

One step closer...


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